Driven insane by telemarketers, tailgaters, politics, hidden agendas, martha stewart, and the flying monkies that steal my underwear at night....this is one person's (sometimes) twisted view.
I pray for those who encounter me before my first cup
Published on December 3, 2003 By REALLYcOnFuSeD In Home & Family
I wake up in the morning, just minutes before my kids will be carted off to school. I roll out of bed, cursing the light pouring through my bedroom window. I shove my feet into my old sneakers and stretch..My children are already up. They're wearing crash helmets and weilding cans of pepper spray, waiting for " the wrath of Mom" to engulf them. My boyfriend rushes from the room with his eyes averted (undoubtably thinking " Maybe, if i don't make eye contact, she won't attack."). The house is completely silent until "Attila the Mom" says, " You'd better be ready to go! Even if your're wearing bermuda shorts, flip flops and scuba gear, i am GOING to get you to school on time!"

FFWD to dropping daughter off at school

D: " Bye, Mom."
A the M: " Get out! Get out! Get out!"
( she scampers for the safety of the gym doors)

FFWD to dropping son off at school

S: "uh...well..uh..."
A the M: " GRRR!"
S: " ok, bye!"
( he moves so fast that theres a loud BANG! as he breaks the sound barrier)


Back at the house, my boyfriend puts a hot cup of coffee infront of me on the table and backs out of the kitchen. I sit sipping the joe, enjoying the silence, relishing the moment. Then i feel the familiar rush of caffiene, and suddenly...
I am having a true "The hills are alive with the sound of music" moment and my boyfriend peeks around the corner (perhaps sensing that the storm has passed) and says "Good morning, honey"....And i smile.

IT'S GOING TO BE A BEAUTIFUL DAY!
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