I threw my daughter a birthday party at the local skate center over the weekend. This was the one thing that she'd been asking for ALL year, so i've spent the last two weeks organizing what i was determined would be an unforgettable experience for her... I had no idea how truely unforgettable the experience would be...for everyone.
There was the usual birthday type goings on. Lots of family and friends, cake, ice cream, pizza, balloons, presents, ya-da ya-da... My sister, who documents every move my family makes on video, followed my daughter around until she was forced to hide in the restroom.
While the kids were all lacing up and making change for the video games, the adults (who were all forced to sit at the GROWN UP table so as not to embarass) all became nostalgic about when it was COOL for us to be in the skate center. And that's when we decided that we still remembered how to stand up on wheels well enough to show our children a thing or two.
So 11 of us traded our sneakers for skates (NO!not inline skates! we're corny, not crazy!) and very carefully made our way to the floor. Turns out that skating is a lot like riding a bike. We all wobbled around the floor for a while and did that windmill thing with our arms until our legs remembered how not to roll off in opposite directions. I think it's safe to say we didn't even embarass the kids too much..Until (you knew there would be a UNTIL, didn't you?)...
I'd been on the floor for a while and i guess i got a little cocky about my skills. I was weaving in and out of the crowd, and was even passing some obviously more experienced 6 year olds, when i heard sombody shout "MOM!" (i'm still not sure if it was directed at me, but any mother will tell you that no matter who is using the magic word,we all respond, even if we know that our own child isn't even there). So i started to slow down and look around, and thats when i realized that i had NO BUSINESS being on roller skates anymore. My back wheel flew off, my legs came out from under me and i went down HARD! That would have been the end of it had i not been going so fast..So as soon as i hit the ground i began the slide from one end of the rink to the other..Taking my niece and brother down with me and starting an enormous chain reaction.
By the time i came to a complete stop and had the chance to see what damage i'd caused, i'd left a sea of tangled skaters in my wake. Two rolling referee's helped me to my feet, off the floor and to a bench. The DJ had stopped the music and a few panic stricken parents ran out to extract their children from the heap.
My daughter, who got to watch the whole scene from the sidelines, was standing in a large group of her friends. They were all laughing hysterically (except for her- she looked like she might cry) and pointing at me.
On the bright side ( if you want to look at it that way- and i choose to so i don't get a migraine), since the defective skate was their responsibilty and i walked away with a serious limp, they refunded the cost of the party to me. My sister, the videographer, got the WHOLE thing on film and is considering sending it to one of those blooper shows. She promises that if it wins, i'll get some of the cash (but if a trip is involved, i'll have to suffer).
No one else, besides me, was hurt and my daughter was very understanding once she found out that i hadn't intentionally set out to ruin her life. But i've had to SWEAR to never put anything on my feet that i don't have 100% control over, EVER AGAIN!